The Last Time

The last time, before last night, that I got REALLY rip roaring drunk off my ass was the day when David was supposed to come home from college. I was 17 years old and got beyond stupid drunk... I got vomiting drunk. I vowed that day to never do that again and while I would have a drink here or there on the extraordinarily rare occasion I never got drunk again. Not at my wedding. Not at parties. Not at all. Until last night.

Yesterday was a really hard day. Tinesy is dealing with a school bully. Then G-man shared some information with me in confidence and asked me to please not share with his father. I'm glad that G-man knows he can trust me with anything and can always come to me. I did something right. It's killing me to withhold information from The Man. I don't keep secrets from him. Not ever. This is going to be hard for me.

Last night with my brain in overdrive I decided, stupidly, to have a shot of rum. I figured a shot of straight rum would help get me a little "tingly" and maybe slow my mind enough to let me get some sleep. One shot turned into three, thinking a buzz might not be a bad thing. Three shots turned into either 7 or 8... I honestly lost count. I remember thinking that I just wanted to feel that buzzy feeling and feel numb and stop my brain.

Well, I apparently waxed drunkenly poetic about how awesome G-man is, and he is. I told The Man about the circumstances surrounding the last time I had gotten that drunk. I had crazy kinky couch sex... okay there's an upside to the whole evening. That was fun and definitely worth experiencing once in this lifetime. Upon trying to get into the actual BED I started puking so slept for a couple of hours on the couch before moving to the bed for just a little while. Then woke up ridiculously crazy early feeling like I'd been hit by a runaway train. Well done, Mami... well done :-/

I've been spending a decent amount of this morning puking some more and feeling like I have an unruly gang of pirates in my belly trying to reclaim their rum. I feel stupid. I should. Ugh. You'd think at my age I would be smarter than this. Nope.